Diatribe on the "new" Episode I

Discuss Episode I - The Phantom Menace, Episode II - Attack of the Clones, and Episode III - Revenge of the Sith here.
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Diatribe on the "new" Episode I

Post by Thoalos » Mon Jun 30, 2008 8:22 pm

Episode I

"The Phantom Menace"

A jedi starship approaches a trade federation blockade vessel. They land thier ship in the hanger and leave the ship. They enter the waiting room. The younger jedi Obi-Wan Kenobi says he senses a bad feeling about this. The neumodians try to trap them inside the room and gas them to death. They have gas masks. The neumodians set them free, the come out fighting. They stow on a droid ship, they make it to Naboo. On thier way to the Queen's castle, they run into a frog man named Jar-Jar. He leads them to the under water cities of Otah Gunga. The Qui-Gon spares his life and the two jedi bring him along with them. They sneak around the castle, to see that the Naboo are in trouble. They jump down off a higher wall and take out the droids. They find the Queen's starship and head to Coruscant. On the way, they run out of gas. They land on Tatooine. Qui-Gon, Jar-Jar and the Queen's favorite hand-maid Padme joins the team. They find a dealership at Watto's. Qui-Gon does some dealing around, but eventually the boy Anakin is entered in a pod race. If he wins he gets to go home. He wins and goes free. On the way back to the Queens starship, a golden protocol droid, dressed in black sith attire and due to advanced neural circuitry can feel the force and is very strong. He hops off his speeder and begins to tear into Qui-Gon. He yells for everybody to get on the ship. He fights Darth Vader away and escapes on the ship.

On coruscant they report the sith to the council, then present the boy. They put him in quere to be trained. They go back to Naboo. This is where the action begins. Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan face Darth Vader again. A magnificent deul takes place all through the palace and out onto the streets of Naboo. Qui-Gon disarms a sabre from him buy blowing up his hand. Darth lets go of the other one and uses it to cut off both of Qui-Gon's hands. Out of the openings of his arms he fires a powerful "force blast" it sends Darth flying into or towards a wall, he uses the force to prevent the accident and flies towards Qui-Gon. As he flies over, he blows up Qui-Gon's legs, then puts his arms in an arm breaker and breaks them. He picks up his lightsabre, does a flip and lands on Qui-Gon stabbing him in the heart performing a down thrust.

Above where Anakin is not allowed, he bombs Darth Vader and destroys him. The battle is over. Obi-Wan becomes Anakin's new master.

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